Playing in the Pages Turns Thirteen! Bring on the Tween Angst.

About a month ago - in fact, almost exactly a month ago - this corner of the Internet turned thirteen years old. 

When I was thirteen years old, I was heading into the eighth grade, had a major obsession with the Sci-Fi-for-Teens show Kyle XY on ABC Family, and was relatively confident that this was the year I was finally going to have my first kiss (I did not). Only four years later, when I was seventeen years old, I started this blog. 

Had I given birth to a baby - that stale and boring summer between Junior and Senior years of high school, when I would reliably boot up the shared computer in my parents' room every afternoon, to check the handwritten list of URLs I had curated in the back of a notebook - instead of a blog, I would have a middle schooler on my hands. If the Disney Channel Original Movies of my youth are to be believed, this would have been the year they found out they were secretly a mermaid. 

Thankfully, instead of back-to-school shopping for training bras and awkward conversations around a well-worn copy of American Girl's The Care and Keeping of You, I get to spend my days pursuing such self-directed insanity as sending 40+ slide PowerPoint decks dedicated to sections of Shakespeare's The Tempest to my brother, compulsively reading backlist mass market paperbacks about vampires and aliens and psychics falling in love, developing a dangerously dependent relationship and pseudo-retail-addiction with my local secondhand store bookshelves, and occasionally remembering to actually talk about it all on this blog. 

Again, I celebrated this anniversary a month ago, and this is the first time you're hearing about it. Clearly, if anything has managed to develop in the space between my ears within the last twelve months, feeling some kind of obligation to regularly update my blog on my various daily goings-on is certainly not one of them. 

(In the spirit of transparency: I've been doing a mind-warpingly awful amount of travel, have been dedicating quite a lot of time and attention to my OTHER internet project, and most recently, in the spirit of "seasonal transitions give me depression," decided to read five-and-counting Romance novels off of my Kindle within the space of a week. Just in case you were feeling left out.) 

So, you might be wondering, how did I spend my bloggoversary this year?

I listened to a bookish podcast while getting ready in the morning, before I realized that I have an extremely limited amount of mental capacity to listen to just about anything while I'm cooking. Certain playlists on my Spotify have the ability to make getting out of bed a minutes-long affair, rather than a nearly hour-long one, but I don't think that I'll ever be able to effectively navigate my morning to the sound of people talking. And then there's the other issue: the difference between a podcast about books, and conversations with friends, is that you can't interrupt the other person when they unleash a blisteringly bad take.

I read for an hour while my zucchini bread was baking in the oven. While there absolutely - at least, in my experience - is a documented and significant correlation between those who enjoy reading and those who enjoy baked goods, no one ever really talks about how great of an excuse having something in the oven is when you just want a little bit of time to yourself. The ten-minute bouts between batches of cookies are especially good for delegating some attention to other kitchen chores - you can unload a dishwasher in ten minutes, spend another ten clearing off countertops, and then another organizing the fridge - and at the end of it, you are rewarded with not only fresh cookies but a clean kitchen, which generates the kind of euphoria in my brain that others might find only accessible through hard drug use. Zucchini bread, on the other hand, requires over an uninterrupted hour of baking, which makes for a great reason to sit on my couch and pick up a novel, while the entire floor of the house begins to smell of delicious things. 

I went to Barnes and Noble. Shocker! I do this every year for my bloggoversary, for the celebratory purpose of picking up some of the books I've specifically saved for that occasion. Thanks to the traditions of years past, my bloggoversary had become one of the only times a year I can justify paying full price for hardcovers, and thanks to choices made during my Fifth Bloggoversary, I typically pick up five titles each year. However, much to my chagrin, arriving at this well-known establishment quickly revealed to me that they had, once again, decided to reorganize all of the shelves and store layout. This, coupled with some pretty dramatically bad shelving mistakes, means I only ended up purchasing three books: 

Emily Wilde's Encylopaedia of Faeries: A Novel, Heather Fawcett

The Way Home: Two Novellas from the World of The Last Unicorn, Peter S. Beagle

The Best American Food Writing 2022, ed. Sohla El-Wayly

At only three titles, that still ended up setting me back $80. How on earth are some people only buying books new? I maintain that reading is one of the most cost-effective past times you can pursue as a general hobby - thanks to things like The Library, secondhand and discount retailers, ebook sales, and lending books with friends - but damn, aren't these publishers and bookstores making it difficult? 

I bought myself some reading snacks from Trader Joes. I had originally restricted myself to a short list: at the age of 29 years old, I know myself well enough that to roam untethered in a Trader Joes is to suffer a short blackout and emerge from the mental fog back in the car with multiple bags of groceries in the backseat, so I knew that some kind of structure was necessary. I had optimistically thought that tags like "something bubbly," "something spicy," and "something creamy" would direct my focus a little more intentionally, but I ended up scrapping it completely and just picking things up that looked good. Meringues, s'mores bars, strawberry beverages, buffalo almonds, pickle cheese curds, and more... 

I scooted over to my local library to pick up a hold of mine that had just come in: The Fourth Wing, by Rebecca Yarros. It has undoubtably become one of the buzziest books of the year, thanks to BookTok reviewers, and what seems to be a universal penchant for books about dragons and love triangles. Billed to me as "Horny How to Train Your Dragons," I had originally placed a hold after a handful of confused conversations with my brother about how seemingly everyone on the Internet was talking about this book, then dedicatedly waited over two months for the hold to come in. (Naturally, the other 44 people waiting for their own holds after me ended up weighing far too much on my conscious, and I ended up returning it early.)

I worked on the final slide deck for my Sibling Book Club I have with my brother, where we spent the month of July reading The Tempest together. It was a tremendously rewarding experience, one I'm still debating on dedicating a higher word count to on this blog later, so all I'll say at this point that one of the most beneficial things I think you can do for yourself before 2024 hits in about four months, is picking one of the funniest people you know and deciding to read Shakespeare with them. 

And while that was the extent of my actual Bloggoversary Day celebrations, it didn't end quite yet. Because I had only picked out those three books from Barnes and Noble, I made myself the promise that if I was able to locate any of the other titles on my list while on vacation, I would be allowed to purchase one or two more at an independent bookstore of my choice. Thankfully, while in Sunriver, Oregon, with my family, I was able to track down Lost in the Moment and Found by Seanan McGuire, much to my immense relief.  

And how do I feel about it?

Maybe it's because I've been doing this all for so long... maybe because I've been checking out a lot of library books this year, during my Book Buying Ban of 2023, so picking things up new doesn't hold a lot of shine for me... maybe it's because we're so busy, that my brain is already more subsumed under a million other focuses... I don't know. 

At certain points, it felt like less of a special occasion, and more of an obligation, which is a bummer of a way to feel about a happy anniversary. 

It doesn't help that I'd been massively trapped in a Summer Slump since the very beginning of July, and  had barely gotten through three books in total that month. I'd only managed to publish once on the blog, which meant that it didn't feel like there was a ton to celebrate in that arena, either.

That all being said, it is so important to me to reflect on the person I was when I first started writing this blog, how much I have managed to write through - the end of high school, all of college, and heading into my 30's this Fall - and what this changing hobby of mine has shown me about myself in these past thirteen years. I would never think of letting this kind of a moment go by unremarked. 

Yeah, I celebrated my thirteenth bloggoversary a month ago. It's pretty cool that I've had something to call solely my own for that long, and that I've kept it going while so many other hobbies have still managed to fall by the wayside as I've gotten older. Whether I'll ever be the maintainer of the "perfect" blog I desired - the kind I'd painstakingly stalk through that summer before I started Senior year - it's a space that has just as much to say about me and how I've grown up, as the stacks of journals I've been keeping in notebooks since I was in middle school. It's telling a whole story on its own, beyond the ones I talk about in its text. 

Happy Thirteenth Year, Playing in the Pages. 

Summer Reading Challenge Pt. 2: What I Read in July!

Yes, I know that today is the eighth of August, and that July ended over a week ago. And yes, I know that there are only three book reviews included in this post, when my June Wrap Up had six! 

But what YOU should know is that I'm currently on vacation, sharing an incredibly noisy cabin with multiple family members that have coerced me into doing things like wake up at 6:30am to go on morning walks and engage in a variety of social environments, and generally keep me so busy that it's not like I've been able to read anything else anyways (not to mention they've consumed nearly half of the candy I bought for myself). All told, it really doesn't matter that I'm late, just that I'm finally full enough of an adequate amount of caffeine to finally upload this post! 

No, I haven't read anything in August yet, either. 

I think that this Summer Slump has really taken me out at the ankles, and I'm still trying to toddle around while regrowing my new feet, as uncertain and ungainly as a baby deer. It's hard to actually sit down and invest time in reading when you're currently being overwhelmed by celebrations for multiple family weddings and engagements, being dragged along on camping trips hobbled by vicious bug bites and a statewide burn ban, and are so, so busy planning on what you're going to do with the money you win when the Mega Millions drawing happens tonight (I'll give you a hint: never go camping again).

Hopefully, August shapes up to be a little more effective at growing my Summer Book Bingo footprint than July was. Or at the very least, I hope that the noise level of this cabin goes down enough in the next few days so that I can actually manage to read anything at all. 

Bingo Square: "Joyful"

Half a Soul, Olivia Atwater

After a confrontation with a member of the fae as a child leaves her missing part of her soul, Dora has found it difficult to interact with others the way her domineering aunt would like her to. However, now that her cousin has decided a trip to London for the marriage season would be in both of their best interests, she finds herself having to navigate an entirely different world of social expectations - including interactions with a certain handsome, badly-behaved wizard - while also doing her part not to hinder her cousin's prospects.

As soon as I read a selection from this novel on a whim, I knew that I could easily finish in less than twenty-four hours. The following afternoon, I proved it, by wrapping up in around 3 hours, and that's WITH a snack break in the middle. 

It's a fluffy meringue of a book, that's for sure. It is light and fun and keeps you entertained, but doesn't have a ton of substance behind it, for all it tries very hard to encourage its reader to be more compassionate... as well as remedy some of the pains that Historical Regency Romances inherently carry, by virtue of their existence during a particular time period in a particular country. 

I think its popularity comes from a combination of factors, like Jane Austen's social comedy, Bridgerton's aesthetic appeal, and Faerie Romances, all popular in their own right. However, for me, it missed a certain something that made each of those concepts so special in the exchange: it lacks the history and authority of Jane Austen, the sex appeal of Bridgerton, and the faerie-ness of a magical environment. One of the reasons I was originally sold on picking up this romance, was its comparison to Howl's Moving Castle by a reviewer... which only really came up in the way that the male main character is a high-strung blonde and a powerful wizard, who has a tendency to reject authority and be strangely-behaved in public. 

I feel that there were enough things slightly off-kilter as to get my attention. For instance, there seemed to be a lot of unevenness when it came to Dora's understandings of social impropriety... which varied from being unable to parse out people's meanings or intentions in conversation, to literally stripping down and washing her punch-soaked gown in an outdoor fountain in the middle of an evening ball, but still managing to catch Elias' verbal missteps in social settings, or subtlety divine the affections of her friends.

I didn't love that last arc of the action, especially because it felt so disconnected from the remainder of the relevant plotting, and kind of like the author forgot to resolve several loose ends before the finale, and didn't want to make it too depressing. 

Additionally, it felt like there was a concerted intention to include some autism representation in the main character... after all, when you have a character that has a demonstratable difficulty in understanding social situations, get frustrated with being unable to express her "larger" emotions, and is reprimanded for her flat demeanor in interactions with others, it is no surprise when people divine such conclusions. But to have these characteristics be the result of her having HALF A SOUL, I am not so sure how positive this kind of rep can be. 

Three stars. 

Bingo Square: "Read with a Friend"

The Tempest, William Shakespeare

Shakespeare's final solo-written play, The Tempest follows the wizard Prospero, as he embarks on a plot of revenge against the nobles who wronged him over a decade prior. When a mysterious storm leaves them stranded on an island in the Mediterranean, we are introduced to a cast of classic characters, including his daughter, Miranda, the handsome prince, Ferdinand, the air spirit, Ariel, and Prospero's hunched and abused servant, Caliban. Carrying themes of colonialism and a heavy focus on music, this is - in my opinion - one of Shakespeare's most notable works. 

I think that by the end of this summer, when I look back at things I've achieved in this time period, I am going to say that choosing to buddy read The Tempest with my younger brother was one of the absolute highlights. Our weekly meetings throughout July might have been a little time consuming - as we usually spent three to four hours or so on each call - but they were absolutely worth it. The project both gave me a chance to reread a favorite at an in-depth level like I've been missing since my collegiate days as an English Major, and gave my brother an outlet for his compulsive need to do homework during a Summer quarter where he's not taking any classes.

It was all of the fun of regulated coursework and hanging out with your sibling that you could ask for. 

The Tempest is my favorite Shakespearean work for so many reasons:

• It is unique within his canon for its status as a completely "original" story, not inspired by any previously existing mythology or folklore, and not drawn from history
• It's something like a Fantasy novel, complete with a magical island, a wizard, strange creatures, and revenge
• Spoiler alert: nobody dies!
• Choosing to alter elements of staging - like various casting, costuming, or set piece choices - can completely alter your perspective of elements of the narrative
• It is clearly reflective of Shakespeare's life as an actor and playwright, with direct references to the Globe theater, his previous work, and the act of creation

Being able to read The Tempest again in this format allowed me to really flex my nerd pedigree and Shakespeare-lovin' background, while also learning some new things myself (and watch about a billion clips of various productions on YouTube).

Five stars. 

Bingo Square: "Worker's Rights" 

There's No Such Thing As An Easy Job, Kikuko Tsumura

After suffering from extreme burnout after dedicating herself to her previous job for over a decade, the time has come for a young woman to find something a little less... difficult. With her only request to her employment agency to find something "easy," she embarks on a series of jobs which subsequently prove that for her, nothing will ever be as uncomplicated as she'd hoped. 

Talk about a book just really finding you when you need it to. I honestly half wish I had read this book years ago, but I'm also incredibly happy I've read it now. Like with How Far the Light Reaches, I knew fairly quickly into this particular journey that it was going to be one of my favorite reads of the year. 

Our heroine takes five jobs, each seemingly less effort than the last.

 She monitors security cameras, writes bus advertisements and trivia for rice cracker wrappers, hangs up public posters, and mans an outpost station in a public park... and yet despite the fact that each of these temp jobs is ostensibly pedestrian, it ends up leading her on another adventure. Surreally spinning outwards, led by dreamlike qualities and unexpected twists, it becomes clear as she follows her heart - and demonstrates a remarkable mind, dedication, and care for the job - that there will never be an "easy job" that appeases her appetite for curiosity and sincere empathy. When the time comes for her previous career to be revealed, it makes sense to what we know of her strength of character, and furthermore, we know she is capable in succeeding in it, with the same confidence that she now carries. 

I found this book incredibly funny, compelling, and emotional. Its dedication to representing Japanese culture and customs makes a lot more sense when you come to the translator's section on the "About the Author" page. It was definitely its own kind of moral tale, with something akin to a thesis statement presented in the form of a conversation that occurs in the final chapter. 

I honestly think this should be required reading for Millennials, or at least anyone who feels like the need a bit of a break. 

Five stars. 

How has your summer been going so far? Where's your favorite book-reading destination you've traveled this year? Let me know, in the comments below?

Summer Reading Challenge Pt. 1: What I Read in June!

Alright, friends. We're two weeks into July already, and if I think about the swift and unrelenting passage of time too much, I'm going to start dry heaving and maybe pass out... so instead of having you go fetch the smelling salts, let's do a little reminiscing on how well June went, shall we? 

June, that glorious start to Summer, when the Washington weather decided to do a hard pivot at the top of the month back into the grayest skies you've ever seen, forcing everyone who lives in the Pacific Northwest to reckon with whether May's 70-degree temperatures and blue views were simply a trick of the imagination. Such a temperate climate can certainly inspire some enthusiastic indoor time - as if ever really needed a reason - and a whole lot of reading. 

A WHOLE lot. In fact, not only my best reading month in all of 2023 so far, but also some of my highest star ratings in recent memory.

So is it any surprise whatsoever that July has been absolutely tanking hard for me, in terms of actually committing myself to this reading challenge? Listen, I've been mainlining fanfiction like it's going out of fashion - and for a brief moment in time just recently, it really did seem like it might have run its course - but actually trying to tie myself down to a published narrative has been completely miserable. 

I figured that instead of listening to me moan and groan about how my weak and puny little arms can't even hoist a hardcover anymore, or the number of times I've accidentally dropped my phone on my face in the last two weeks, we could talk about the books I totally loved last month. We might as well do something productive with our time together, you know? 

Here's all of the SIX books I read back in June, and which Seattle Public Library Book Bingo Reading Challenge squares they helped me check off! 

Bingo Square: "BIPOC Poetry Collection"

Time is a Mother, Ocean Vuong

A tender and emotional reflection on grief surrounding the death of their mother, Ocean Vuong's second poetry collection is deliberate, compelling, and worth sitting with awhile after you've finished it. 

I had a convo with a friend back in March about Poetry, and how it just doesn't come naturally to me. We talked about mulling over phrases in your mind, remaining open to the spirit of interpretation, and reading things two or three times before you really started to pull the threads that bound together metaphor. Poetry may be brief, we decided, but it takes time. It is WORTH your time.

Time is a Mother is one of those highly-regarded poetry collections that has also gone a little bit Instagram-famous. Just days after finishing it myself, I came across an announcement that it had been released as an audiobook on VINYL, if that can be any indication of not only its popularity, but also, the kinds of people who are its biggest champions. 

But I don't think that's a bad thing. If there's anything that I'm taking out of that convo with Kayla, it's that poetry should engage and connect with its audience, no matter what forms that takes. Ocean Vuong is not any more or less legitimate as a poet for their words reaching the hearts of a larger audience, just like I am not any more or less legitimate as a poetry reader for needing to take pauses at the ends of lines, parse out words, reread phrases to better explain the metaphor to myself, and take breaks between poems to consider what I've read. 

I don't think I'm ever going to be a true-blue poetry reader. I mean, I'm all for Shel Silverstein, and I do enjoy a good dirty limerick or two. But this rarefied air is difficult for me to breathe. The lofty genre-based legitimacy of calling myself a Poetry Enjoyer is still far from my reach. But it's incredible to note that these kinds of challenges bring me further and further from my comfort zone, allowing me to stretch myself until that tight ache forms between my shoulders. Only with poetry, the ache is in the heart. 

Four stars. 

Bingo Square: "BIPOC or LGBTQ Horror"

The Only Good Indians, Stephen Graham-Jones

Over a decade after a shared act of violence altered the lives of four reservation boys forever, something has come back to seek a retribution for the destruction they wrought. Now men, this revenge attempts to undue the relationships they have formed and the lives they've built, chasing them as far as they can run... even when the direction they're pointed seems to be towards home. 

Okay. This book has given me quite a lot to ruminate on. Unfortunately for me, the book also came highly hyped and recommended by not only one, but two people of my immediate acquaintance, and in attempting to organize my many scrambled thoughts into something remotely resembling an actual review I could relay to my friends, I decided I needed to jot down a few notes. Extensive notes. Six handwritten, single-spaced pages of individual notes, squiggly and squashed, in my Book Journal, in a space where normally a review would exist. 

It still doesn't exist, by the way. I'm still weighing over the various segments and pieces contained within this bundle of firewood that was The Only Good Indians, each twig or branch a separate theme or motif that itself would merit at least three pages of graded classroom material. What can you concisely say about something you're still thinking about, over a month later? Whose material you're still weighing in your mind? 

Something something about genre. I mean, I feel that this particular Horror novel leaned more to the side of Magical Realism for me, than straightforward Horror, maybe because the main characters kind of took all of the freaky stuff in stride when it started happening... maybe because we got action described from the POV of the villain? Were they really a villain? Maybe because it carried so many of the markings of folklore... maybe because the descriptions were so vivid and emotive, that it all felt kind of wrapped in a layer of magic? It didn't feel like a Thriller either, for all that aspects of it really were thrilling. 

Something something about pacing, too, I think. I feel like we lost a little bit of ground in the final segment, the one focused on Denorah. Whereas the other puzzle pieces kind of interwove action AND description AND character, the final stretch just feels like one big chase sequence, with far less emotional heft. That's a concrete thought; congratulations to me. 

Something something about characters, but I really can't get into it without unwinding the various interconnected spools of yarn that bind my hands over the course of an hour or two. If you want to get into discussions of how Gender influences this novel, of how Youth and the redemption achieved by way of the virtues of the subsequent generation might save us all,  of contemporary values of Traditionalism, Earth Stewardship, the ferocity of War and Nature both, of news stories as public perception, of the all-consuming destructive power of Revenge... ask me about it later, once I've had a chance to think about it a bit more. 

Four stars. 

Bingo Square: "Same Author, Different Genre #1"

Paladin's Grace, T. Kingfisher

After the death of his god leaves him and his fellow paladins without purpose, Stephen has resigned himself to doing his penance as best he can by assisting the Temple of the White Rat. However, when a local perfumer named Grace seems to keep running into trouble in the same circles, he can't help but be interested, especially when her perfumes are accused of poisoning a nearby monarch. The fact that decapitated heads keep showing up around the city, though, is also a concern. 

In total, I enjoyed this book. I think that's what I have to start with: I had a good time reading it, the world it occupied was fun, with a varied cast of characters, some of whom I really enjoyed meeting. It was incredibly funny, and did a great job in balancing action and description.

But I didn't love it. The pacing felt pretty uneven, and it took a little while for the main plot to actually get underway. Some parts felt like a lot was happening, and others felt like I could easily skim through dialogue until something finally DID happen. 

But most of all... I HATED one of the main characters. Certainly not Stephen, who was incredibly funny and charming, but instead, his love interest, Grace. It was like every scene she was in lost air: she's a downer, she's constantly complaining, she keeps finding herself in questionable circumstances and only seems capable of reacting in one of two fashions - doing something equally reckless and nonsensical, or completely shutting down and crying. 

In a regular Fantasy, this would be totally fine, because you wouldn't need to occupy that character's frame of mind all that often. But it's not! It's a Romance Fantasy, and emotional perspectives are kind of key to the genre, and the function upon which the majority of the action is based. Which meant we spent a whole lot of time with Grace... and across the 400 or so pages of the book, I really don't think she improved much at all. 

The actual Romance scenes weren't my favorite, either. 

Will I read more in the series? Sure, probably. I did actually enjoy it, like I said, and reading two books by T. Kingfisher for the first time, in one month, made me realize that I am, in fact, quite a fan of T. Kingfisher. But I'm not jumping out of my seat to recommend this one in particular: I've heard that other titles in this series can kind of act as standalones, so maybe I'll read the next one soon and let you know if it's even worth it to handle this one at all. 

Three stars.

Bingo Square: "Graphic Novel or Manga"

Lore Olympus: Volume One, Rachel Smythe

Winner of the Goodreads Choice Awards for "Best Graphic Novel in 2021," this graphic novel series follows the classic story of Hades and Persephone, told with new and modern sensibilities, in an Olympus that looks a lot closer to a modern day city. 

Here's the thing: Lore Olympus is almost universally beloved, as you can clearly see reflected in the Goodreads rating (currently: 4.31 stars). It was an incredibly popular independently-published webtoon before it was purchased for print publication, there are already four volumes published within the last few years, it's incredibly popular on TikTok and Tumblr alike, and even when I was checking it out from the library, one of my favorite librarians told me how much she absolutely loved the series.

I didn't like it. But it's one of those things that I feel like I have to somehow explain or justify, based solely on how much seemingly every other reader LOVES it, in an all-caps kind of way.

At this point, I think I'm just pretty darn biased against modern-lens mythology vibes. I hate that Olympus is a city; I hate that they have things like malls and sports cars and strip clubs. I hate pretty much any kind of storytelling that co-ops previously-existing literature, and applies a sort of Sparknotes-sideways view of them to shoehorn into stereotypes, in order to fit a modern setting: Hermes is an oblivious jock, Apollo is a domineering and self-obsessed model, Artemis is a spunky girl-next-door, and Hades is a mopey loner. I hate it!

The women are all petite and curvy, with big eyes and dark eyelashes, and the men are all wide-shouldered and incredibly tall. Persephone is a kind of straight-off-the-farm type, who seems to only exist to be taken advantage of, by multiple male characters in just one volume. Zeus and Poseidon are all balls and no brains. The only thing I can say in the characterization's favor is that this is one of the only representations of Hera, of all the pantheon, who is not just absolutely awful. In fact, I liked her quite a bit.

The art is quite visually striking, and the colors are aesthetically pleasing. And for what is clearly a whole lot of people, they really, really love this series. Just not me.

Two stars.

Bingo Square: "Sea Creatures"

How Far the Light Reaches: A Life in Ten Sea Creatures, Sabrina Imbler

Documenting marine biology profiles alongside reflections on their own life experiences, Imbler's How Far the Light Reaches will be the most unique memoir you read this year... as well as the most enthralling. 

I had finished my previous read kind of disheartened, and was a little miffed before I went to bed. Arbitrarily, I decided to read a couple of pages in this one before I fully gave up for the night... and an hour later, I had impulsively finished the first two chapters.

This book is half-memoir, half science journalism - the author's career background - interweaving descriptions of marine animals with personal perspectives into the life of the author. Vivid descriptions of invasive goldfish, cuttlefish, octopus mothers, salps, and more, provide the background for explorations on race, belonging, eating disorders, and the queer experience.

Both deeply personal and uniquely informative, I knew within those first few chapters that this memoir was going to be one of my favorites of the entire year. The writing is welcoming, but literary; the prose is lyrical, but highly aware of its scientific background; the voice is reflective and emotive but slightly detached, holding the reader at an arm's length while whispering personal truths.

I didn't know that chapters about sturgeons and sand strikers could make me cry! Because they weren't, not really, but about the immigrant experience and the fuzzy relationship between alcohol and sexual assault. Imbler's incredible ability to make biology accessible, relevant, and interesting when entangled with details from their own life were incredibly accomplished, and in today's cultural environment, as resonant and important as ever.

To be clear: I checked this out as a library book, and plan on picking up a copy for my own personal library sometime in the new year.

Five stars. 

Bingo Square: "Same Author, Different Genre #2"

The Twisted Ones, T. Kingfisher

After the death of a long-removed and nearly-forgotten relative, Mouse is tasked with venturing to the sticks of North Carolina, and seeing what can be salvaged for resale. While sifting through the hoarder's junk, she stumbles upon a mysterious journal, written by her step-grandfather, detailing some of the terrible things he's seen in the woods around the house. At first, Mouse dismisses it as the ramblings of an old man... until she comes face to face with some of them herself. 

I haven't read Horror novels in a while - a function of being an incredibly anxious human being with a reasonable amount of self-awareness - but somehow, in the month of June alone, I ended up reading two of them.

However, like with The Only Good Indians, I don't know if I'd classify this strictly as a true-blue Horror: While TGOI held important reflections on contemporary perspectives on race and folklore, The Twisted Ones felt a little more akin to a Fantasy... perhaps because Kingfisher's "white ones" felt so reminiscent of traditional stories of the fae of Northern Europe.

The narrative combined its classic Horror elements with a distinct Appalachian twang, and Fantasy reminiscent of Irish fairy stories. But instead of a dreamy, nostalgic haze, these folks of the hill aren't the type to grant you a boon if you leave cream out at your window. Impossibly tall, bone-white pale, and harnessing otherworldly power, the holler people live in a hill that is not always there, is not always possible to cross to, and is protected by a hodge-podge crew of poppets, terrifying pseudo-alive creatures constructed from bits of bone, fur, wood, and what junk they can find lying around.

I genuinely did not see the twists coming when they happened, especially because the other elements of the book were refreshingly open and straightforward. Mouse is never alone or told that she's crazy... and yet it was still thrilling and eventful nonetheless. It was really novel of this novel, to be able to build tension based on something other than ostracizing the main character, honestly. 

Plus, it was just SO funny.

Four stars. 

What have you been reading this summer? What's been your favorite so far? Let me know, in the comments below!

Why a Library Card Might Be the Key to the Best Summer Ever

Congratulations, everyone, we made it: it's officially the First Day of Summer 2023! 

Granted, it doesn't exactly feel that way. For instance, the local school district still won't be scrawling "HAGS" in their yearbooks until this coming Friday, which feels incredibly unkind to those students who are still taking Finals for the next two days, despite the fact that Summer has officially gotten itself underway.

On the other hand, our family has already gone on our first camping trip of the year. I've had visits from my younger sister, who missed Washington sunshine by mere days, and am currently enjoying the company of my younger brother, visiting from the other side of the state. One of the counters in our family's kitchen has been stocked with what my mom calls "Summer Bar" - aka, seasonal liqueurs and mason jars with handles - for the last few weeks. My zucchini are already threatening to crowd out the carrots, and my strawberries have so many runners you'd think they were planning a marathon.

I think it's safe to say that Summer, whether your school district likes it or not, is truly here. 

But whether you've been celebrating the sunshine since June 1st, like I have, or you're still counting down the days until your manager signs off on your first Summer Friday - aka, the true beginnings of "drinking on restaurant patios" season - chances are, you're already making plans for how you're going to spend all of that free time. 

And I know just how you should: at your local library! 

now, hear me out

Granted, this is a books-and-reading-focused blog. Whether you're just now stumbling onto my corner of the Internet, or if you've been a frequent flyer for quite a while (Hi, Dad), chances are you don't need much convincing. 

And yet. 

Just a few weeks ago, I was scrolling through my feed on Bookstagram, and noticed that a fellow enthusiast who I'd been following for quite some time had recently made a significant life change: after years of living in New York City, and furthermore, working adjacent to the Publishing field, she had taken the plunge with her partner, and traded in their big city apartment, for a house in the suburbs. And for the first time ever, she wasn't just navigating a world on a much wider scale than she was accustomed to, but she was also contending with an entirely new challenge... that of learning to use her local library, for the first time, as an adult. 

So it's even within our own ranks, of Book Enjoyers Everywhere, that some might need a little convincing to branch out, and check out your local branch, to check out a book or two. Again, even my own father - I SAID HI, DAD - himself a lifetime reader, ventured off to the library with my brother and I earlier this year to pick him up a new library card, in order to make better use of the free audiobooks and ebooks available through the Tacoma Public Library system. 

If you're new to the game, no worries! There's no age limit as to who is "too old" to get a library card, let alone try something out of your comfort zone. There's nothing to lose, and everything to gain. And let me tell you something: the artistic choices for the library card you pick up, are probably a lot more aesthetically pleasing than the one I've had since approximately 2010 or so. 

And the best part is, Summer is, by far, the best time to get a library card. 

let me tell you why

Well, first of all, there's the material, physical benefit. Libraries are a public good, and as such, are one of the few places you can exist peacefully in the world without having to pay money for the privilege. Howard Schultz may think that he made Starbucks into the world's great meeting space; however, unlike Starbucks, libraries have restrooms without codes to unlock them, and friendly workers who are much more likely to spell your name correctly. 

They also have - barring general disaster - guaranteed air conditioning. And almost always a place to refill your water bottle, and usually chairs there, in case you need to just sit down and take a minute. They usually have computers you can use for free, and a printer that you can use for a certain amount of pages each month, for less than a dollar. Sometimes they're built next to a public park, or picnic tables, which are also more than enjoyable on sunny days. 

And while these all might seem like petty goods in comparison to what you might already have at home, they're not nothing. Not for a lot of people. Things like access to computers and the Internet, to comfortable environments, to social connection and community access, aren't guaranteed, though I think most sane individuals would agree they should be. 

Plus, I've also heard they have books there. 

The books thing is pretty cool. I mean, I think you should check out your own local library just to see how many books they have! Bet you can't count them all... but if you're willing to try, well, then, be my guest. 

But really, the whole "free books" thing is just half of the reason you should give a library a chance. 

(Note: I focus mainly on the Tacoma Public Library and Seattle Public Library, because they're what's local and accessible to me; however, you should absolutely stop by your own local library branch and ask a friendly librarian what sort of opportunities are available at your own local system!) 

TAKE PART IN A SUMMER READING CHALLENGE... OR SEVERAL

Summer Reading Challenges have been a longtime favorite of librarians the world over. For children, they help combat the Summer Slide - the documented downgrade of academic acumen that takes place during the months of June through August - by incentivizing continued reading development by way of fun prizes. For adults, it gives them a chance to pursue a new goal, or stretch their bookish wings during prime reading season... and also win fun prizes! 

No matter your age, chances are, your library has a Summer Reading Challenge you can enjoy, too, for no cost to yourself or your kiddos. It may require you to pick up or print out a Reading Challenge tracker - like Bingo sheet, a Candyland-style track, a puzzle, etc - or in this high-tech day and age, download an app on your phone. Depending on what your local branch's style is, you might be tasked with reading for a certain amount of minutes to progress, or checking off various book titles you've completed. 

Each is a great chance to test your own limits, and give your summer a fun challenge to undertake. You might surprise yourself, in seeing how much reading you can accomplish. 

And did I mention the "fun prizes" part? 

VISIT YOUR LOCAL MUSEUMS... AND SO MUCH MORE

Take, for instance, my local library branch: the Tacoma Public Library card can grant you access to a variety of museums and local attractions, many of which are perfect to enjoy during the hotter days of the year. 

For instance, I could check out an "Art Access Pass" for free entry to the Tacoma Art Museum (usually $18 for an adult visitor), a "Glass Pass" for the Museum of Glass ($20), a "History Museum Pass" to the Washington Museum of History ($14), a "Waterport Pass" to the Thea Foss Waterway Seaport ($10), as well as various local garden passes, like for the Rhododendron Species Botanical Garden ($8), and Lakewold Gardens in Lakewood ($12). 

That means that if I wanted to make a summer project out of visiting everything the library passes had to offer, I would be able to experience $82 worth of local museums and gardens for zero cost to myself! 

All you have to do is look for the pass by location to see which libraries have the pass available, and check out the pass at your library as you would any other item.

Once you've got it, you simply present the pass at the museum or attraction, to receive free admission for up to seven days. Important note: the quantity of available passes varies by location, and you can't check out two of the same kind on the same library card... so make sure the friends you're planning on going with have library passes too!

Also note: passes cannot be put on hold, and are available on a first-come, first-served basis. They also cannot be renewed, so make sure to visit before the return date. You just return the pass to any Tacoma Public Library location as you would any item, which makes for an easy end-of-day task once you're done enjoying yourself at the museum. 

Maybe you can even check out a book when you're done?

TAKE A HIKE... OR A SWIM

Here's another really cool thing Tacoma Public Libraries is doing: as part of a cooperative project called "Check Out Washington," in collaboration with Washington State Parks, the WSP Foundation, the Washington State Library, and other various groups around the state, Tacoma Public Library cardholders have the ability to borrow a Discover Pass! 

If you don't come from an intensive camping background, like my family, you might not know what this means: a Discover Pass provides the necessary payment to help our state parks well-funded, and allows you to visit whatever Washington state parks you'd like. You actually can't visit without one (lest you incur a much more expensive fine). 

Honestly, I think a Discover Pass is a worthwhile investment, as a tree-hugging Washingtonian, anyways: we're a state well known for our gorgeous, protected public lands, as well as plenty of serviceable public recreation areas. Regularly, a Discover Pass will run you $30 for an annual membership - considering adding it to your Christmas List now - as well as $10 for a one-day pass. When you pay to camp at local campgrounds - which can run you pretty steep, depending on where you're pitching your tent - the Discover Pass is likely included at the time of purchase. 

But once you get comfortable with checking out Discovery Passes from the library, you can visit day use areas as much as you'd like, for absolutely nothing! 

According to their government website, Discovery Passes can be used to access "more than 100 developed state parks, more than 350 primitive recreation sites, including campgrounds and picnic areas, nearly 700 water access points, nearly 2,000 miles of designated water and land recreation trails," and even more. I'd say that getting all of that for free is a pretty worthwhile use of your time. 

(Note: while the Discover pass works on Washington State Parks and some other state-funded lands, it doesn't apply to federally-protected lands, like Mount Rainier, or the Olympic National Parks. Check out this website to find all of the places you can visit, and ideas on what to do when you get there!)

Unlike the museum passes, which place limits on how many people can use it at once, a Discover Pass hangs from the front windshield of your car, so there's less of a limit placed on those who can go adventuring with you! Bring along whatever friends you'd like for a hike, a swim, a bout of birdwatching, some frisbee, roasting s'mores in a firepit... whatever activities you can think to enjoy outside. 

You can check out a Discover Pass from a nearby Tacoma Public Library branch during service hours, using a valid library card, but during these gorgeous summer months, you're encouraged to check out the online catalog for current availability first. Discover Passes - like the museum passes - are available on a first come, first served basis, so you'll have to put in a little work to make sure you grab one when you need it! 

START A PODCAST... YES, REALLY

TPL has recently begun offering podcast kits you can check out for a limited time, and use to record, edit and upload high-quality audio. Specifically, they offer both All-In-One and USB Microphone podcast kits, and have a limited number of each, designated for two groups: "Grades 8-12" and "Adults." 

According to their website, "[t]he All-in-one kit includes a portable Zoom H1n Handy Recorder which allows for easy recording of high-resolution audio, and is perfect for starting out on your podcasting journey," and "the USB Microphone kit is ideal for voice overs, and home studio recording." Both of these sound incredible for anyone looking to pick up a new hobby, or figure out if this otherwise costly undertaking is right for them! 

And they're not just offering up the tech equipment: TPL is also staging "Podcast Cafes," a monthly group meeting led by a local digital media expert instructor, covering as varied topics as effectively setting up a usable recording space, how to generate interesting content across episodes, and even culturally-minded analyses on the popularity and effectiveness of current trends in podcasting. It allows you to connect with other people who might be undertaking the same journey you are, which allows you to pick up tips from other podcasting newbies, and provides a network for those looking for support in their creative endeavors. 

So whether you're an adult looking to learn a new skill set, a teenager looking to build out their resume before college apps are due in the fall, or a group of friends looking to find a new outlet for their creative conversations, you might want to see if your local library offers podcasting kits, too. 

I mean, you can even start up a podcast, using library equipment, about the books you've been checking out of the library! 

ATTEND LOCAL EVENTS... AND FREE ACTIVITIES

Okay, I feel like out of everything I've said so far, this might be right up there with "they've got books" as a kind of obvious function that libraries serve. 

After all, if you're like me, you might still vividly recall when your local branch used to have that great big room reserved for community meetings, where you'd occasionally overhear a local book club or lecture taking place. Like I mentioned, libraries are a community hub, one where people can easily gather for free. 

Then again, if you're like me, you also might have no idea as to exactly how MANY events and activities are available through your local library. I mean, I certainly didn't... at least, not until I started doing a little bit of research. 

Yes, they absolutely do have lectures and classes, usually available for free, and they're pretty darn cool. For instance, they're typically tailored to your particular locale, which means than some of the lectures offered in my neck of the woods for this summer include things like eradicating Northern Giant Hornets, earth stewardship-focused beach walks provided by experts, local government information sessions, and how to save money on your utilities, presented by Tacoma Power and Tacoma Water. 

Plus, how to make a box fan air filter... very necessary for Washington residents come August. 

Other offerings include a visit from the Reptile Man, as well as a Shelter Pets adoption event in collaboration with the Tacoma Human Society, and even an information session to learn more about Metro Parks Tacoma, our local Parks and Recreation service. All of these can only lead to more adventures across the summer! 

And if you're looking to get connected to other local readers, they've got plenty of options for those, too. I think almost all of them offers a book club or two. Typically these meetings are tied to things like location of the library branch, or a particular genre, but also cover a diverse range of things like LGBT reads, as well as "Books on Tap," which meets offsite each month, at a local brewery. 

Amongst the Tacoma Public Library calendar, there are links to local scavenger hunts, community puzzle events, game nights, checkers and chess games open for anyone, seed swaps, movie viewings, and so much more. There's plenty of children's storytime events, like you might expect, but also pajama storytime for families, and even adult storytime, where you just might encounter your next great read. 

There are art lessons... including "paint and sip" and "sculpt and gulp" nights, for those who are inclined to test their artistic merit under the influence, as well as lessons in string art, bottle rockets, and more. There's a virtual meetup for those interested in various kinds of fiber arts, too! 

Fans of nerd culture can take part in Pokemon League for both deck and DS users, Dungeons and Dragons parties, Comics and Animation Club, Lego "Brick by Brick" Club, Nintendo Night for Grades 8-12, and Mario Kart gaming. 

There are tons of movie + craft options, all of which appeal to me greatly, like a "Ghibli at the Grand" event downtown, where you can watch Spirited Away with free popcorn and make your own wooden bath token, or "Do You Believe: a Month of Cher Movies and Crafts," which, as you can see from the above conversation, has led to much excitement on the part of my sibling and I. 

Those looking for a little public assistance might be interested in events like like legal aid pop-ups, digital instruction for seniors, or drop-in tech help. There's also events for homeless outreach that provide library patrons "with comprehensive life resources" as needed. 

I'm sure that those looking to invest their time in those kinds of resources are more than welcome to reach out, as well: after all, the library is always looking for volunteers, too!

have I convinced you yet?

Yes, I know, this is an absolute behemoth of a post. But if you've been impressed by its length, that's only because of the incredible amount of challenges, events, and experiences made available to you, through the magic of your local library! 

Like I said in this particular blogpost, my experiences are pretty squarely tailored to my personal local institutions: the Seattle Public Library and Tacoma Library systems (as well as the Pierce County Library system, and King County Library system), are all the closest available resources for me, which means I've got a lot to pick and choose from.

To figure out what's on offer at your library, I heartily recommend checking out their website, or visiting in person to ask a friendly librarian about what kinds of resources they have available for your to check out. There might be plenty there that's not even included in this list... things like virtual reality headsets, other kinds of park passes, and even more adventures that await you, if you just take the chance to ask! 

It's like they said on Arthur: "Having fun isn't hard, when you've got a library card!"

Are you taking part in a Summer Reading Challenge? What sorts of events and activities do they put on at your local library? Let me know, in the comments below!

Seven Steps to Prepare for a Summer Reading Challenge, According to Me

The arrival of Summer is heralded by different things, for different people. 

For some, it may be the first time you hear ice cream truck music crackling through burnt-out speakers, playing through an open window. For others, it's when the temperature tips above a certain number of degrees (Tacoma hit 80 in mid-May this year). It may be the last of final papers graded and input into your classroom portal, or it may be the quiet resignation you feel towards finally starting to clean up the yard a little bit, while the grass is still green. 

For me, it's when the Seattle Public Library finally publishes their Summer Reading Challenge Bingo Card for the year. 

First discovered when I was in my senior year in college, living in my own apartment for the first (and last) time - soaking up as much independence as I could while completing my final class before graduation - SPL's Summer Book Bingo has become as quintessentially "summer" to me as strawberry lemonade, local baseball games, or manhandling gargantuan, spider-covered zucchini from the garden. 

It is the defining factor as to how much room I need left in my luggage while I pack for Central Oregon, or what's going to keep me distracted from the mosquitos or wildfire smoke we inevitably encounter on our various camping trips. It's what causes my purse to hang a little lower, with the heft of my Kindle tucked inside, when someone decides on an afternoon jaunt to the waterfront, and it provides the backdrop for a variety of gorgeous titles in my room, luxuriating in the late evening sun that splashes across my bed, shining through the slats of the blinds. 

It's what decides if my August is spent in tense self-hatred, or a warm feeling of accomplishment. (Full disclosure, in the many years I've been taking part in this challenge, last summer was pretty much the first time ever with this challenge that I got to enjoy that second experience.) 

The point is, SPL's Summer Book Bingo provides a framework around which I organize my summer reading, every year. It has led me to books that changed my worldview ( like This is Going to Hurt, by Adam McKay), and books that I still mutter about under my breath (like Paolo Bacigalupi's The Water Knife). It causes me to reach beyond my comfort zone, or indulge in old favorites, or finally pick up that one title on my shelf I've been eyeing for forever. 

And yes, it's still not the only reading challenge I have on deck for this year. (Because of how much I love The Ripped Bodice, as well, it's not even the only bingo reading challenge I'm taking part in THIS SUMMER.) But it is the one that takes up the most of my time and brainpower, and the one that earns itself a giant stack of books teetering perilously across the span of my endtable. 

Because I want you to take part, too, I figured I'd make you a handy step-by-step guide on how to prepare for your Summer Reading Challenge of Choice. 

(Though if you are taking part in the SPL Bingo, too, I certainly can't wait to hear about all of your plans!)

STEP ONE: Wait, anxiously, for weeks, until your Reading Challenge of Choice finally gets uploaded to the Internet. For Seattle Public Library's 2023 Summer Reading Book Bingo, that means May 25th. For the Ripped Bodice's 2023 Romance Book Bingo, that's June 3rd. Both feel like an eternity. 

STEP TWO: Print out your Bingo card, or various reading challenge forms of measurement. For some people, that might look more like hooking up to an app on your phone - which is increasingly used at libraries these days - but for those of us who prefer a more tactile recording style, that means you either have to hightail it to your nearest library branch, or print out your own copy online. 

(And if you belong to the Summer Book Bingo challenge in Seattle in particular, make sure your printer has plenty of yellow ink left. Trust me.)

STEP THREE: Get your bearings. Read through your Challenge one or two times before you even take another step, just to get a lay of the topography of what you're working with. How confident are you, before diving into the nitty gritty work? How are you feeling? 

Assemble one (or two, no more than three) beverages or snacks of your choice, grab something to write with and something to write on, and mosey on over to your TBR stack(s) or shelf(/ves). 

STEP FOUR: One by one, go through each square on the Bingo Card. Try not to balk at anything too early, daunting though they may be - 'Joyful?' you may think, 'Hip Hop'? 'Sea Creatures'? - but just take each new square as it comes. When greeted by the prompt, does anything come to mind immediately? Are there any 'Indigenous Author's in your stacks? What about a 'Manga / Graphic Novel'? Start to assemble your Summer Challenge TBR Stack with things you already have on hand; no Barnes and Noble run or library holds waiting required. 

Of course, some of them are going to get you stuck. The Seattle Public Library has, thankfully, thought of his already, and has put together various lists for you to choose from, should you not be able to make it on your own. Some are, obviously, not included - for instance, 'Read with a Friend' has a lot more to do with a Friend than the Library - but most are there for you to select from a large assortment. It's up to you to decide! 

(And if the Library Lists don't work out, of course, there's always Google, and Goodreads Genre Lists, and Storygraph selections, and all sorts of pathways for diving your future reads. Make sure you reach out to a bookish friend or two and see what they're reading this Summer, as well!)

STEP FIVE: In the case that you've figured out a book worth reading that fits the Challenge prompt, but you don't necessarily have on your shelves, then you've got a perfect solution: remember how these kinds of challenges are hosted and promoted by your local library? It's time for you to use it! Even for someone with particularly robust reading shelves, like me, I still had to place about twelve different holds for books throughout the library system to cover absolutely all of my bases. 

Make sure you're taking into account things like Due Dates, which might otherwise interfere with your summer reading plans, as well as Holds Lists, because chances are, other people are taking a part in the same challenge you are, too! I'd recommend going after "achievable" holds lists only, and not bothering with those that might take longer than your summer to get through: for instance, Shelby Van Pelt's Remarkably Bright Creatures certainly might have fit the "Sea Creatures" bill perfectly, but there are over 30 people in the holds line before me, and there are only ten copies on deck in the library system for lending. Yikes! 

If you're the kind of person who is NOT on a Book Buying Ban - you lucky thing, you - make sure to plan where you're picking up each of your reads, too, and get to ordering what you need. Barnes and Noble, or Half Price Books, or Goodwill? Thrift Books, or Bookshop.Org? Chart your course! Though I would, of course, recommend starting with your cheaper options first, and climbing upwards as availability wanes. Remember some online retailers, like Book Outlet, have fairly long wait times for your packages, in case you're trying to get your books read sooner rather than later! 

STEP SIX: After you've got all of your materials pulled together, it's time to rank your stack. Anything with a Due Date goes on top first: any and all library books have got to go, before someone else stakes a claim on your title before you finish it! 

Next up, are any books that have been lent to you from other bookish companions, so you don't force your very generous friends to wait for you. Then, everything else! 

STEP SEVEN: Plan it out. There are approximately fourteen Sundays between Memorial Day Weekend and the first Sunday of September... you need to make sure you know what goalposts to be hitting each week! If you're trying to complete the Seattle Public Library Book Bingo, that means twenty-four books, across fourteen weeks: if you can commit to reading two books, every week, then you'll end the Summer Reading Challenge with time to spare... ideally, for more reading! 

Are there any books, in particular, you're going to want to read earlier or later in the Summer? What's going to make for the perfect beach read, or what will make more sense to keep at home for weeknight dedication? Which Horror novel are you going to want to be safe in your own bed while reading, and which Romance makes more sense to bring along with you on that overnight camping trip? 

At the very least, try to divide your stack so that you know what you're going to be attempting for your upcoming two weeks at a time.

Then, all there's left to do is get started! Make sure you keep your Book Bingo Card handy, for easy recording, and keep on top of those Library Due Dates, so you don't incur any unnecessary fines as a result of sheer enthusiasm. Check the Events section of your local library's website to see if there are any Reading Challenge-related events you can attend; SPL partners with Seattle Arts and Lectures for this exact reason. Check out an author visit, or if your library branch is super high tech, see if you can attend virtually.

There's more Summer Library content coming down the pipe from me, but for now, get to charting your course for adventure this summer, by taking part in a Reading Challenge! I can't wait to see what new treasures you'll discover this year... my own challenge is already well underway.

Are you taking part in a Summer Reading Challenge this year? Is it through Seattle Public Libraries and Seattle Arts & Lectures? Let me know, in the comments below!

Top Ten Tuesday: Things that Make Me Instantly NOT Want to Read a Book

"Top Ten Tuesday" is a weekly bookish shareable, hosted by That Artsy Reader Girl!

So, here's the thing: usually I like to start my "Top Ten Tuesday" posts with some kind of prefacing, before we hit the theme. General remarks about how my life is going, what I've been up to, usually why I haven't been reading all that much, the whole shebang. But there's a bit of a problem with that this week... because I also usually write the rest of the post before I write the introduction, similar to how I used to write the body of my papers before I tackled the introductory paragraph (which, if you know how to do this properly, totally streamlines the difficulty of actually getting started writing your paper). 

Which is why I can tell you right now, that this blog post is somewhat inordinately long. 

What can I say? I've got a lot to say. You already saw it at work last week, when the "TTT" theme was a mirrored version of this one: ask me what makes me immediately want to pick up a book, and I'll write about 2K words about it. Ask me about what makes me NOT want to pick up a book? Well... maybe I'll write a little more. 

Maybe I'll write a LOT more. 

And before you get started making your way down the list, let it be known that I'm making a personal judgement call here: I originally tried to draft this blogpost by tackling hard subjects like "Undisclosed Sexual Assault," "Uninformed Interactions with Racist Language," and "Pretty Much Anything from Anyone Involved in Politics as a General Profession But Political Celebrities in Particular," because each of those are, 100%, things that will virtually guarantee I do not even touch, let alone purposefully read, that book. However, in trying to detail my thoughts and feelings, it started making me so angry and upset that I was paragraphs and paragraphs in before I realized that this wasn't a blogpost I even wanted to be writing, let alone would would ever even want to read as a fellow reader. 

So I refined my scope and tried to keep things closer to target for things that were specific, funny or interesting, or at a minimum, less absolutely dire. In the words of Marge Simpson, "Kids, could you lighten up a little?" 

Warning: The Sass Factor was not lost in the rewrites though. I'm still propelled by that feeling of righteous fury, it's just lodging itself into different targets, some of which you might not agree with.

Just my opinions, though. Careful: they're a little... wordy. 

1. Multiple Points of View in the Narrative

Starting out with a bang here! I asked my brother for help writing this list, and boy, did he deliver: "You always complain about Multi-POVs." You sure bet I do!

Mutli-POVs are annoying for those who prefer linear plot, confusing for those who are easily distracted, and are especially agonizing for those of us who have to pick up and put their book down multiple times a day during short breaks. Depending on the size of the cast of characters who form our viewpoint into the world, it might be eons before I swing back to the same person again, and by that point, I will most likely have lost the grip on who they are, what they're doing, and where we were last time I checked in. 

From a slightly more critical perspective, it can also come across as a cheap and easy way to build suspense, especially when your chapters end on Nancy-Drew-style cliffhangers. By chopping up perspectives into fragmented pieces, you're forcing your audience to keep reading to gain understanding, and when it comes in such truncated morsels being switched around like a shuffled deck of cards, your readers run the risk of losing the plot, and it can be hard to jump back in as seamlessly. 

I've straight up thought about reading a book all the way through, one POV at a time, rather than just keep swimming through. That's how much this particular style drives me nuts. 

(That all being said, I do love some Leigh Bardugo. I'll brave it - and more - for her.) 

2. Overly Numbers-Focused or Specific-Detailed Nonfiction

I'm not saying I've ever been diagnosed with dyscalculia, but I'm also not saying that anyone has ever tried. 

I'm all about backing up your information with clear and discernable proof, but at the same time, you could be just putting whatever numbers you wanted in there and I would literally never be able to tell the difference. I don't necessarily want the specifics unless they're in clearly communicated percentages, and even then, feel free to round up to the nearest ten or something. I believe that you know how to interpret data better than I do; just skip to the good stuff and let's get on with it! 

Furthermore, I feel similarly about incredibly detailed lists of names, for both people and places. I'm willing to bet the scholars go crazy for information overload like this, but I am not a scholar, I am just a girl who is considering whether to adjust her position lying down on the sofa because reading like this for too long is making all the blood lazily wander towards my elbows, and now my fingers are numb. 

I do not need to know the specifics, I'm just here for a good time. 

3. Horny Fantasy Fae, in General, but Sarah J. Maas in Particular

Doesn't the whole thing just remind you of the Paranormal tidal wave - of moody black covers, and models with bang-covered faces and mysterious tattoos, and backless ruffled dresses - that overtook the YA shelves of Borders back in, like, 2008? Only now, we're tackling iteration after iteration of thorn-entwined titles, ambiguously described monarchy systems, and all too many discussions about wingspans and tails. 

What remains are the broody, tattooed and angsty poster people. And, as always, descriptions of piercing eyes, be they green or blue (or, occasionally, purple). 

The thing that stings the most is that I was absolutely a fan of Maas, back in the original run of her popularity... approximately ten years ago. For people in the know back when the book blogosphere was a happening place - back when I was too busy resenting the medium shift that was already turning towards YouTube, let alone ever thinking everyone would someday take up future residence on TikTok less than a decade later - I got into a little series called Throne of Glass, the first book of which was published the summer I graduated high school. Have you heard of it? (More importantly, were you one of the people who read all of the novellas when they were still only offered on ebook, long before Assassin's Blade was released?) I only stuck with it through Heir of Fire, but remained interested in Maas' work. 

A Court of Thorns and Roses was published all the way back in the Spring of 2015, and when a friend in the English major asked me "You like Beauty and the Beast retellings, right?" I was ecstatic to borrow her copy. I ended up sticking with the series all the way through A Court of Frost and Starlight, which came out only three short years later, in 2018, before I decided I had had enough, and bailed. Despite the fact that I started reading traditional genre Romance-with-a-capital-R that same year, I really didn't love where I saw Maas' series headed, and had started to get bugged by some of the quirks of her writing style that were only thrown into sharper relief the more I read on. 

Lo and behold, about five years later, I've been tempted to start a drinking game for every time a well-meaning, usually younger friend asks me, "Oh, you like to read, right? Have your heard of ACOTAR?" And while I still absolutely respect the various faeries and their tails of my youth - Hi, Holly Black, I will always love you - I definitely don't pick up that many of those kinds of books anymore. 

4. Men Who Write Under Deliberately Gender-Ambiguous Pen Names So That You Think That Their Women-Centered Novels Were Written By Women, Because Capitalism Works Better That Way

(Important Note: neither transphobia nor prejudice against nonbinary individuals have anything to do with what I'm talking about here. What I'm telling you is that Riley Sager Thrillers - which unilaterally feature female main characters in danger, occasionally placed into gender-specific peril - are written by a man who identifies as a man and writes under male names like Alan and Todd, except when he wants to publish as Riley. I'm talking specifically about Men Writing In the Hopes That You'll Think They're Women In Order to Sell More Copies of Books Where Women Are Usually In Danger, because they know they are writing books that center female main characters, which are primarily marketed towards female readers. Trans and nonbinary authors, on the other hand, are rad as hell.) 

Some of you may be balking at this point, saying "That's not a real thing." Or maybe you're rejecting this based on the principle that it's a double standard, because women have done this for centuries: after all, George Eliot was a woman, the Brontes (Charlotte, Emily, Anne) originally had to publish as the Bells (Currer, Ellis, Acton) to get any kind of eyes on their work, and even Victoria Schwab chose to publish Fantasy under V. E. Schwab, rather than have a more recognizably-female name leading the way in a male-dominated genre.

And some of you, for the first time, are realizing right now that Riley Sager is actually a guy. 

(He's also far from the only one doing this in contemporary Thriller publishing, as was covered fairly extensively in 2017, in The Atlantic, the Wall Street Journal, in MEL Magazine, and by the Guardian. Some great, more conversational coverage was provided by some of the ladies at Smart Bitches, Trashy Books, for an individualized perspective these writeups don't cover.)  

And for the record, yes, I absolutely hated, HATED Final Girls, in part specifically because I hated how the female main character was written, long before I found out she was written by a guy. 

5. Romances When There Are Babies and Kids Involved 

For the love of all that is produced in mass market paperback and has a shirtless man on the cover, I don't want to ever read another Romance novel where kids are involved. There's just too much that can - and depending on the care of your author, will - go sideways. 

For instance, I hate the "surprise baby" trope in all iterations. I also hate the "miracle baby" plot resolution technique. I have heard of, but have thankfully never encountered, the "accidental pregnancy" trope, thank GOD, because I honestly don't think my anxiety can handle it.

I hate the "precocious daughter" who encourages her dad to ask out her pretty music (or dance, or art) teacher, and I hate the "angry teenage son" who the boyfriend has to win over in order to really get with the mom. I hate children who talk like adults, and children who demonstrate abilities and understanding far beyond (or below!) appropriate growth benchmarks for the sake of adding some kind of dimension or humor to lackluster dialogue, and I especially hate when they are used as a tool to push an unnecessary narrative choice on behalf of their parent, only to never be brought up again. 

Do people have kids? Absolutely. Do people with kids deserve romance too? Hell yeah! But then let's have plots where those kids actually act like actual kids, whose lives are actually tied to their actual parents, and don't exist solely to railroad a particular plot direction or generate otherwise bonkers stakes for the couple to be together, or even just establish sympathy for a character (because let's be real, the guy might have a daughter, but that in no way precludes him from being a total jerk). 

I blame my loathing of this entire thing on Hallmark Channel Original Christmas movies. 

6. Escapist-Genre Authors Who Don't Take Their World-Building "Hard Topics" Seriously

Maybe I'm just voicing gripes about world issues here, but I've had a couple of books in the past few years who have really lost points in my eyes, because they couldn't get an appropriate handle on the important subject matter their main characters were engaging with.

If your Science Fiction interacts with the after-effects of warfare that ravages a civilization and displaces a wave of refugees... if your Fantasy involves an enslaved race of peoples subjugated under a tyrannical rule that perpetuates in their daily interactions within social classes... if your Romance deals with severe misogyny or god forbid, some form of sexual violence, I'm going to need you to step the hell up and engage with that kind of plot content seriously. Put your big kid boots on, and get to marching: do the hard work, do right by your characters, and do right by the world you live in. 

If all you can offer up is a general "gosh, I feel bad about that" sympathy shrug from your main characters - oftentimes only to set up the idea that they're the 'good guys' - without any form of meaningful interaction or demonstratable change, or for heaven's sake, if you're just trying to instill it as a kind of backstory quirk to make this character notable or interesting, then why the hell are you putting such content there in the first place?

Maybe just don't trifle around with real life hard issues... if you don't actually care about them? 

7. Straight-White-Male-Dominated Fantasy Worlds (Like, Your World Has Dragons In It, But God Forbid Two Women Talk To Each Other)

It is a major point of difference in the reading decisions of my brother and I, that I do not enjoy the Lord of the Rings novels. I tried it - spent over a month of my freshman year of college attempting to trudge through Fellowship of the Ring, and eventually emerged on the other side so burnt out that I didn't read anything else for about two weeks after I finished it - and I did not like it. 

(As I glibly remarked to my brother recently, in regards to the movies, if I wanted to hear about a bunch of white dudes backpacking through New Zealand, I would have stayed in touch with more of the fraternity guys I knew in college after graduation.)

If I'm actually going to sit down and dedicate my time towards reading a High Fantasy, there had better be at least three or four female (or gender-non-conforming) characters named within the first forty to fifty pages. Not even main characters, just... people! And they've got to be actual people, with motivations and voices and a variety of ethnic backgrounds. I don't care how many Zs or Xs or inappropriately distributed apostrophes their names have; what I do care about is if anyone in your main cast is same-sex-oriented. 

If you can conceive of a Fantasy world, with its own geography and language and cultures and foods, and you're still coming out on the other side with nearly everyone in the entire novel just being a straight white dude whose only distinction is in what weapon they carry and what facial hair they grow, then I don't know what to tell you. 

Maybe just that the world is an exciting place to live in, and you should go meet more real life people before you try writing any more fictional ones? 

8. The Phrase "Whatever God Looks Like to You," or Plenty of Other Couched Religious Thoughts Like It, in Self Help

To defend myself a little here, I was raised Catholic. I read Catholic- and Christian-oriented books with some degree of regularity. But the thing about Catholicism is that... it's not exactly known for being subtle. Chances are, beyond the Spanish Inquisition, you're going to see Catholicism coming from a mile away. 

I don't know what it is about the Self Help genre, but there are an awful lot of religious folks in here. And in particular, there are a lot of Christians who want to couch their religious convictions behind a thin veil of pseudo-secularism. 

It drives me absolutely nuts to see Christian values nestled inside a Self-Help book with the idea that

it's somehow able to be parsed out in your own individualized direction with a flippant note from the author. It's relying too much on the reader to somehow adjust their own perspectives and experience, rather than have the author deconstruct how their own beliefs inform their insights in the first place. 

Notably, the book I have on display here - At Your Best, by Casey Nieuwhof - is an example of the appropriate way to do this within the Self Help sphere: he's literally a pastor, on top of being a motivational speaker and author, and not only does he immediately clarify the role religion plays in his life from the introductory material, but almost no doctrine actually comes up when discussing the Self Help principles he recommends, only in how making these kinds of lifestyle changes affected his own work schedule. Be like Casey. 

9. Fantasy Words That Are Just Straight-Up Corollaries for Previously Existing Countries and Cultures

(Okay, to be very clear, I'm not coming for Leigh Bardugo again. I love her! But again, this is absolutely something she does in her world-building. To the point: recently, I was reading about the war in Ukraine, and stumbled upon a reference to the Russian city of Novosibirsk. I spent about ten minutes puzzling over why that name sounded so familiar, until I realized that Novokribirsk is one of the Ravkan cities adjacent to the Shadow Fold in the Grishaverse.)

I think it's more of a factor in Middle Grade and Young Adult Fantasy - or, like with some movies and television shows, and a whole lot of video games, more of a wider-spanning media phenomenon - but if your only contributions to building out an entirely new world are to muddle up the names a little bit, and just adopt, wholesale, entire cultural touchstones of that particular country without identifying it specifically, then I don't know if you're doing your world a service in its construction. Nor really the people of that real-world country. 

I acknowledge that this is occasionally very intentional (for instance, The Hunger Games deliberately takes place in a post-apocalyptic America, and as such, the Districts operate as recognizable parts of the United States). I just also think this is occasionally very lazy. And occasionally, kinda problematic. 

For more info why, check out this incredibly detailed TV Tropes page on "Fantasy Counterpart Culture."

10. Just Not Really Being All That Interested In Reading It... At Least, Not Right Now. 

This is, by far, my reading habit that most drives my brother up the wall. I am - notoriously, historically, frustratingly - a mood reader, first and foremost. And it can absolutely tank my enjoyment when I try to read something I'm just really not feeling in that moment. 

For instance, I first read Naomi Novik's Spinning Silver when Washington was in the middle of a stretch of snowy days. It was absolutely perfect... because I was in the right mindset to read something wintry and cozy! On the other side, I've had Katherine Arden's The Bear and the Nightingale waiting on my TBR for a while now, sitting around for the right kind of weather forecast, no matter how often my friends have told me to just tackle it on the sooner side. 

Additionally, I am almost never, ever in the mood to read Horror... but one of the few times I do, is during the Summer, when the days are long and I have far less reason to be as afraid of what goes bump in the night as I am during the Winter, when the dark is near inescapable. That's why some of the rare times you'll see me picking up something like Stephen King is in July or August! (And certainly never on a camping trip.) 

It all comes down to how I'm feeling about it. And, you know, the stars. 

What's in YOUR Top Ten? Have any similar vibes to my list? Let me know, in the comments below!